Time For A Paddle

As I write this blog, sitting in a hotel on the Gold Coast, I've just been hit with the realisation that the 3,000 or so kilometers I've driven in 75hrs to get here, with take me around 75 DAYS to paddle back.. and then I'll have 'only' another 750km to go..... What the hell am I doing?!

In just 3 days I'll start my attempt to be the first person to ever SUP the 3,750km down Australia's longest river system.

It seems ridiculous to even say it.

More-so when I think of what this actually means.

In 1 week I'll begin spending 90 days in a row, alone on a SUP board. for 8hrs or more. I'll be forcing myself to paddle ~50km per day, regardless of if it's over 40 degrees or if it's pouring rain.

When I first had the idea it, to me, it seemed a fair trade off. The effort was going to be equal to the accomplishment, and for a long time excitement of finishing the trip, meant the start couldn't come around quick enough for me.

But as the countdown shifted from months to weeks, and now to days, the excitement has made way for stress and fear.

The last few weeks seem to have gone missing, and a large part of me is still preparing for Christmas, only to find that it's already time for Australia Day (..Happy New Year?..)

Organising sponsor's and gear, mapping the river, having my board damaged by a delivery company, losing and breaking my paddle's, not training because I'm stressing over emails, stressing over not training, and having support crew members pull out (get in touch if you'd like to help out!)....

It's been a stressful few months, and at the root of all this stress is the fear of failure.

I'm honestly terrified of failing. The trip is now well publicised and I do feel some pressure from all the eyes. On top of that is the fact that 3,750km is a long way to paddle. More so, it's a long way for someone who only got on a SUP board for the first time a little over 3 weeks ago to paddle.

(3 months ago if you count my makeshift training on a kitesurfing board, but it's still a long way).

If I actually do make it to the end I think I'll be as astonished as everyone else.

But within this fear of failing, is the first key motivator for me. Simply, I don't want to fail.

There's been many creative ways people have suggested I might come to harm or not complete the trip.

My personal favourite; A shark swimming up from the Murray mouth, jumping over the locks and barrages in the river system, finding the correct tributaries and then attacking me in Warwick on day 1 (hey, it could happen..).

All of these suggestions I have taken on board (I'm now carrying a can of shark repellent) but have progressed with the trip. Completing the paddle is something I want to say I have done, so I'm going to try.

I'm afraid to fail but not to try, and every extra bit of effort I have to overcome will just add to the accomplishment.

The second key motivator for me is the question I ask myself when the stress becomes a bit too much:

"What if I had chosen to do something easier instead?"

Placing a bit of emphasis on one word in this question changed my whole perception of this trip.

"What if I had 'chosen'' to do something easier?"

This trip has been my own choosing from the beginning. I chose the distance I wanted to paddle, I chose the mode of transport, and I chose the charity I wanted to donate to.

The children who will benefit from this fundraiser didn't choose to be deaf, they didn't choose to have limitations placed on them by others because they are deaf, and they don't get to wake up and choose to take the easier option.

The funds raised will go towards education and enabling deaf children to pursue their goals.

They will never be the best at hearing but with our support they can choose to become the best at anything else they want.

The trip is going to be tough, I know that much. There'll be times when I'll almost be hoping for that shark to find me but amongst those two key motivators are thousands of others, and it's going to be enough to keep me paddling.

This trip will just be a challenge of trying to remember that motivation when things feel tough.

It's time to go for a paddle....

I'd like to thank you all for your support so far.

Together we have reached $10,000 and spread the message of SUP4DCA to thousands of people.

#SUP4DCA #3daystogo #countdown